Thursday, July 25, 2013

Delivered of (?) a prince. By George! George of Cambridge, Mandela of South Africa and the trauma of farm murders. Connecting the dots …

Delivered of (?) a prince. By George!  George of Cambridge, Mandela of South Africa and the trauma of farm murders.
Connecting the dots … 
  
By George! Lesson # no. 1: Baby delivery is not a DHL-style delivery of a parcel but rather to be delivered from something that can harm you if it stays too long inside.

Was it only me who found the wording of the royal baby announcement displayed on the easel in front of Buckingham Palace strange? “ …the Duchess of Cambridge was delivered of a baby ….” 

In older video footage they said Diana was ‘delivered of a prince’.  Delivered of (?) a baby?  Perhaps it was my bad English (my second language) that caused me to think that a baby is delivered almost like a parcel, not necessarily by a stork (although the picture did enter my mind), but almost like a DHL delivery. My expectation was that the delivery agent in this case was Duchess Catherine and that she laboured hard through a painful process to deliver a royal baby to the British nation, a heir to the throne, a future king to a number of commonwealth countries. But the actual wording on the easel has more of a ring of the wording in the Lord’s prayer: “…deliver us from evil …” Delivery here in the sense saving you from something that can harm you.

Having being fortunate to be physically present at a number of births, I am to this day still in awe of the miracle that plays out when a child is born. The pain of separation brings not only new life to the baby but also new life to your wife who can now recover and continue with her life without having to carry the one she nurtured inside her body forever. I should have known: In my mother tongue an Obstetrician is called a “verloskundige” – literally translated as a ‘saving-scientist/doctor’! Perhaps we forget the fact that it is dangerous for the health of the mother and the child if the baby stays too long on the inside: 266-270 days normal – anything more than 285 days is dangerous and detrimental to the health of mother and child. Then the childbirth must be induced by the doctor – the ‘saving-doctor’  - to deliver her of the baby.

So Kate was delivered of the baby, and young prince George Alexander Louis of Cambridge was delivered from the womb, which could have become his prison if he stayed in too long. Little George is now free to be a great leader one day. Who knows:  Perhaps he (like all princes and kings in story books of my children) will do great deeds in years to come: With a lion-heart he will be brave and he will deliver the goods by delivering his nation in critical moments in history from whatever is threatening them. 

Lesson # no. 2: Delivery comes from within: Leaders must be liberated before they can lead.

This is where Nelson Mandela comes in. His most famous quote:  “As I walked out the door toward the gate that would lead to my freedom, I knew if I didn't leave my bitterness and hatred behind, I'd still be in prison.” His greatness lies in the fact that he was liberated from within. In other aspects he is just like other leaders with their good and bad points. But he was great because he knew he had to be delivered of hatred before he could lead. Without being delivered from within, he could have been consumed by hatred and destroyed a nation. South Africa’s neighbour Robert Mugabe of Zimbabwe is currently destroying his country because he was never delivered from within …

Lesson # no. 3: A friend, life coach, father, teacher, speaker, counsellor helps others to be liberated from things on the inside that harm them.

The farm murder? In my daily work I do also trauma counselling. Assisting a family after their father was brutally murdered on a farm in South Africa, we sat around a table discussing: The culprits will hopefully be soon behind bars as a result of their horrendous acts. But we shared: The family will not be safe and secure if they only introduce new security measures. They will only be victorious if they don’t  allow this happening to replay in their minds every day. They won’t allow the terror agents any mind space. They will win - not in finding meaning in a senseless killing – that is impossible. But they will use the human ability to create new meaning and find new motivation. In doing so, they will be even better off after the tragic loss of a beloved father. They will be prepared but not be paranoid. They will be diligent but not vindictive. They will create meaning instead of being consumed by hatred. They will be free and the culprits will be in jail. Actually in two jails: The one behind bars, and the prison of hatred and greed, that a murderer carries within.

Not the recent Mandela Day celebrations, or the birth of a Royal baby, inspired me as much as the bravery of a South African farmer family, who knows their victory lies in not in being safe from the outside but being free from the inside.  Their father was not saved from the attack, but they are delivered from the inner hatred that could have poisoned the whole family.
They will go from strength to strength, and continue to be leaders in their farming community because they understood the concept of being “delivered of …”.


Thank you George of Cambridge.



Dr Gustav Gous  is an International Motivational Speaker and 
Executive Life Coach with experience on 5 continents. In the past he 
was the in-house counselor for the petro-chemical company Sasol 
for 9 years. He facilitated in numerous Trauma counselling sessions
after industrial accidents. He is known for his Transformational leadership 
programmes on Robben Island, titled the “Short Walk to Freedom”. 
He is a Certified Speaking Professional (CSP) and past President 
of the Professional Speakers Association of Southern Africa and a 
member of the APSS (Asia Professional Speakers Singapore).  
Currently he is heading up the Diversity Intelligence Institute, 
specializing in rolling out Diversity Intelligence interventions for 
international companies.   www.gustavgous.co.za , www.diviin.com ,
www.diversityconference.co.za    gustav@gustavgous.co.za    drgous@iafrica.com
Follow him on Twitter: @GustavGous  or on Facebook and LinkedIn .





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