Dr Gustav Gous on Cultural and Diversity Intelligence and Life Planning:...

Take courage: CANcer CAN be beaten

CANcer CAN be beaten

Just recently sat with a friend supporting him in taking on the battle against cancer. Under the impression of what we discussed and shared, I reached for my laptop to dot down a few ideas. For anybody struggling with a so-called terminal disease, remember the following 11 pointers:

1. More people die with cancer, than because of cancer.

2. CANcer can be beaten. Focus mentally on the ‘can’ in cancer.

3. For us all (with or without an illness): Live every day full out as though it is your last day, and plan as if you are going to live for a very long time.

4. The looming reality of death (waiting for ALL of us) must bring us all to the point that we return to true priorities: What is important must become important again and what is unimportant must be regarded as such.

5. We must all realize – life is too short for bad coffee. There is no time for pettiness and nonsense – for majoring in minors.

6. Start asking the right questions: Do not ask: Why? Or Why me? Even if you get an answer to these questions .... what will it help? Rather ask: What now? How can I best spend the time (24hour day) that I have now.

7. Resist being paralyzed in the present (by fear or ‘angst’). You cannot always change the reality, but you can change your focus in the reality. Horizontally: Shift your focus from the looming danger to the opportunities that you do have: To love while you can, make a difference while you can, sort things and relationships out, and leaving a legacy (tasks that all people should do anyway). Vertically: A person of faith will focus on God (Psalm 121) and will enjoy God as Emmanuel, present and there for you in every situation.

8. All of us have a choice how we die eventually: 100% sick: 33.33% Physically, 33,33% Emotionally/Socially/Relationship wise, 33,33% Spiritually. Or 66,66% healthy: You body can and will give in one day but you can be spiritually and psychologically in perfect health! Long term cancer patients who eventually lost the battle, told me in counselling sessions that this was the good part about it: That they had enough time to become 66,66% healthy. They had peace.

9. My Father survived cancer 5 times (first diagnosed and operated on when he was 50 – he is now 86) for two reasons: (1) he is a person of faith and God cured him miraculously – more times than he even expected himself (confusing his oncologist!), but also (2) Because of his optimistic spirit. He is an arch optimist: When you ask him in the most difficult circumstances, ‘How are you?’, his reply would be: ‘Sometimes good, sometimes better. So today is just good.’ And he will continue: ‘Actually, when it goes well with me, I am well, when it goes terrible, it actually goes better, because of the growth opportunities in it.” Mmm .... what do you say about that!?!!.

10. Live full out with the realization that death is part of life: I lost my mother to cancer. All of us will eventually die. Make your life count while you can. Then there are no regrets when you have to say goodbye one day.

11. Death is not a wall. Death is a door.

Is it easy to handle? No. Is it possible to eventually come to terms with it? Yes.

Dr Gustav Gous was the in-house counsellor of the petro-chemical company Sasol for 9 years. He still does counselling but focuses more on Executive Coaching and long term company interventions as a consultant on Emotional-, Leadership- and Diversity Intelligence and other intra-psychological aspects of business. www.gustavgous.co.za ; www.diviin.com ; www.diamondprofiling.com gustav@gustavgous.co.za

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Six feedback questions to improve personal performance.

Six feedback questions to improve personal performance.

Start by asking yourself the following six questions: What must I ....

1. # Continue to do. ...

2. # Do more (increase) ...

3. # Stop doing ...

4. # Do less (decrease) ...

5. # Do differently ... and

6. # Start doing ...

... to be more effective? Self evaluation is always a good starting point if you want to improve yourself in work and personal context. There is nothing wrong with a long hard critical look at yourself in the mirror. It can perhaps give you a fright but will not harm you – it can be the starting point for personal change. But it must not stop here. Because we all know that you have three selves:

- - the one you think you are

- - the one others think you are

- - and the one you really are ...

... you must also ask the above questions to a number of significant others to save you from being caught up in your own subjective perspective.

I was sitting earlier today with an executive coaching client, and shared in his very honest moment of answering these questions for himself. Afterwards he emailed the questions to his CEO, his coleagues on his level and to one or two trusted deputies.

We are awaiting the answers but I am sure it will help him tremendously in getting a fuller picture of who he is and where he must change: His personal growth agenda for the year.

Why don’t you do it too?

These questions can obviously also be used for 360 degree feedback in teams.

Dr Gustav Gous is an Executive Coach rendering service to blue chip clients in Africa, Europe and the Middle East. www.gustavgous.co.za Follow him on Twitter: GustavGous and on Facebook and LinkedIn. gustav@gustavgous.co.za

Best team to work for: All the attributes.

Best team to work for: All the attributes. I recently sat with a group of HR professionals and asked them to think back to the best team they have ever worked in. We then tried to identify the elements that made it such a good team and experience. Perhaps you will find the list that we compiled interesting. Have a look and compare it with your list of the ideal team:

1 Strong leadership (Vision, direction, the leaders shows interest in you as a person).

2 Self directed team, made up of competent people who were motivated selfstarters, committed to the cause, people who took responsibility for their different tasks.

3 A team with a BIG purpose, you know you make a difference.

4 A crystal clear plan, with common goals: A game plan with realistic time lines.

5 A team that strives for success: They do things well, achieve targets with the resulting sense of achievement, and, very important, celebrate the big successes. (Mastery)

6 Every member has a personal growth plan with timelines: You get good feedback from the leader (and 360 feedback from colleagues) on your strengths and growth areas. All in all, you are encouraged to grow!

7 A clear career path or growth plan: When you achieve things, you get the promotion.

8 You are challenged in accordance with your talents and abilities and have autonomy to execute. You are allowed to be in charge, others have the freedom to help you.

9 Empowered to do your job: When you were new: They took your hand and ran with you.

10 You feel included – leadership and colleagues involve you, and include and expose you as a young leader to areas of the business beyond your level, in order to groom you.

11 Team members trusted each other.

12 You are free to express yourself: Allowed to think innovatively.

13 Quality of life: Work/life balance. You have a life while making a living.

14 You are valued as a team member.

15 Team members care for each other. They even give emotional support to each other. They become more than team: Become brothers/sisters and father figures for each other.

16 Good listeners: Open minded - even when opinions differ.

17 Honest with each other: Honest feedback.

18 Can talk about problems – have methods to handle conflict.

19 Leverage each others' strengths – use diversity of talents to compliment each other.

20 High energy levels.

21 Have fun together.

22 Attitude of ‘it is not about me’. The team, organization and higher purpose must be served.

24 Good support systems in the rest of the company.

25 Members coach each other at different levels and transfer skills: Go beyond a learning organization to a teaching organization! (With apologies to Jack Welch! - GG)

26 Can deal with cultural, gender and personality diversity – have the secret to create a ‘unity-in-diversity’ team.

27 Recognition and reward for performance (awarded according to your preference and personality type!).

Sounds a bit like an unrealistic utopia? Is it out of reach? No! There are winning teams around the globe who do get it right. They are the teams who win the cup/prizes/awards, and achieve the targets.

Feel free to use this checklist as a starting point for discussion at your next team building session. Please add missing elements, if you identify any, in the comments below!

Also feel free to contact me to assit to achieve some of the above in your team – especially the work/life balance; the diversity issues and the secrets of self-motivation. Also for team assessments. Dr Gustav Gous. www.gustavgous.co.za; www.diviin.com +27123455931 +27825657451 Follow me on LinkedIn: Gustav Gous Facebook: Gustav Gous Or Twitter: @GustavGous